Point of Light

There's a point of light
That lives inside of me.
It is me
And it isn't me.
It has no name,
Only beauty.
Wisdom.
Purity.
Innocence.
I know this point of light.
This point of light is the entire universe.

There's another being
With whom I am familiar.
She is me
And she isn't me.
Her name is Abigail,
And she is beautiful.
Ugly.
Loving.
Hateful.
I know this other being.
This being--Abigail--is a dream.

This poem was inspired by one of the early chapters in Adyashanti's The End of Your World. This book is basically a guide to the experience of awakening and everything to follow. The chapter I read this evening was titled "I Got It, I Lost It" and it really struck some chords with me.

In this chapter, Adya speaks about what it's like to know the deeper nature of reality while simultaneously living in a state of separation. He describes some spiritual pitfalls and other obstacles one may face.

These topics all rang true with my recent and current experience. I had a mystical experience a few months ago which led me to spiritual awakening. I had what Adya describes as a "honeymoon" phase with my awakening; everything was fine and dandy, I was a newer, nicer person who would never be negative again (warning: major pitfall). I had it! But as a couple months went by and school got crazy (see? Here I am blaming school), I lost it. Adya mentions that this is entirely normal and reiterates that it is nothing the individual does wrong, just a rough patch in the road to enlightenment.

Thus, this poem was inspired. I've met my true spirit. I know for a fact that in the deepest sense of reality, I am that beautiful, innocent point of light. However, I must also acknowledge that the Abigail I know is also a part of my spiritual experience and she won't always act from love, kindness, and compassion. Sometimes, she's pretty terrible.

But I can't hide from her or oppress her. All I can do is accept her and everything she may do, good or bad, and eventually, the point of light will integrate with the Abigail and the Abigail will be influenced by the light.

Anyway. Long winded explanation for a little poem.

Sweet dreams, friends. :)

p.s. Come see my ego perform some classical singing on Thursday night at 6:30 in Roxy Grove!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) <3